A journey through grief with autism.

Alan Greenwell

2-Minute Read


Tomorrow is Tam’s last day at what I would call junior school. He moves up to senior school in September. It’s really the same school but a different site a few hundred metres away. It feels like a big change for him and me.

The days starts with a leaver assembly. Followed with a brief meeting with his new teacher Sarah. Get something to eat and maybe pop home and then back to school for a care meeting and pick Tam up for the last time from Site 1. It will be sad. Plus I will continuously be thinking about Bev not seeing her son on his last day at a school we visited so many times together.

Six weeks holiday. We have some stuff planned but not enough.

Update - 20/7/2019

Tam would not go into the leavers assembly,it was too noisy. The whole day was one of reflection. It was full of what if’s, all of them based around Bev not being there.

I am pretty sure that Tam understands that it is now the holiday and he has no school for 6 weeks or so. He virtually collapsed last night when he got home. He was asleep by 10pm and did not stir until 11am. My boy slept.

Today he has been cuddly and cannot really be bothered to do anything but we have been for a walk to get his favourite pizza. I feel his lethergy. I think today and tomorrow will be chill days and on Monday it’s another part of Tam’s adventure at the respite centre. Second nights stay, so it will be interesting to see how he copes. Plus he will spend more time there so its a bit of a different visit with no school in between. How will I cope, will it be a repeat of reflecting on the past 18 months, will it be grief descending like a heavy weight again. Control over what happens is not available to me so I am trying not to worry about it.

Thanks again for reading,

Alan & Tam

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