A journey through grief with autism.

Alan Greenwell

3-Minute Read


Keeping Tam fit and healthy has always been a major factor in looking after him. I have wrote about how not having the ability to communicate with him or understand the reactions he has to pain makes it difficult to decipher what is going on with him. For Petes sake he once ran into a bed end with such force and all he did was giggle. No crying, just giggling. He had a huge bruise and a big lump. Thankfully no break. The hours of confusion that day because my little lad was just giggling after banging his leg.

The current world situation is being hyped up by the press (to a degree). Covid-19 is new and science is learning as fast as it can from the case. Yes, its a bit concerning for the wider population and particularily for the older population but for most people it will be a 7-14 day inconvience. Unless of course it changes radically (picture me standing on the fence with that statement).

I have read the advice (struggling with advice and advise again) put out by the government and NHS and its sensible advice that we should follow. My problem right now is keeping Tam safe. Part of the advice is to wash your hand for 20 seconds, tick, Tam hates dirty hands. Next part, don’t touch you face and eyes, no chance. Tam when he stims rubs his eyes, covers his face and generally cannot help himself or be stopped from doing it.

Last night, to try to break the crazy sleep patterns he has fallen into, we went to the pictures. It was very quiet, not many people there. Only one other family in the screen with us. We went to see Pixars Onward. All good, Tam excited and following his routine for going to the pictures. Buy the tickets, cake at Starbucks, tiolet, find the screen, compare the ticket to the screen, find our seats and settle down. All the time I am wiping his hands and he is touching everything. Half way through the film it all becomes too much and Tam is building to a meltdown and he asks to leave (very proud that he asked to leave and regulate himself). He is stimming quite heavily and covering his face and rubbing his eyes. After a few minutes of being outside the screen he decides he wants Pizza Hut and we don’t go back into the movie and head off for something to eat. He calms down.

Stop me I am prattling on.

The point of this post is that for all I think that the press is hyping things up to a fever pitch it is still concerning. Yes, it’s concerning. I am certainly concerned. We lost Bev very quickly from the effects of flu and the rapid changes it can bring on in someone who would have been described as healthy. Tam saw all that happen. What happens if I get Covid-19, who would look after Tam? What can I do to keep Tam safe from it?

Well the answer unfortunately is “what will be will be”. All the effort in the world will not change things. I cannot stop Tam touching his face. He needs to go to school I need to do things and if we get to lock down then we will just cope. “Just cope” by the way means we will make the best of it, not that we will teeter on the edge of not coping.

Stay safe, keep washing your hands and stop bloody touching your face. Look I said stop touching your face! There you go again, touching your face, stop it.

Stay safe out there

Alan & Tam

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