A journey through grief with autism.

Alan Greenwell

2-Minute Read


Yesterday Tam was getting back to normal. This morning he woke with a cough. It was not the usual cough but enough of a cough to be a worry. It went on for a couple of hours and was joined with a couple of sneezes and some sniffling. Temperature was OK but with Tam temperature is never a good indicator. He seems to have a standard temperature of 36C.

After a few hours of cough my anxiety was getting the better of me. Heart rate flying, fight or flight running rampant and closing in on a bad panic attack. I rang the doctor. After a phone call which settled me it was decided that for all the symptons where not a full match for COVID-19 but it would be better to self isolate.

In a way this makes life more difficult and easier in different ways. One thing I will not be able to do is go shopping while Tam is at school for perishables etc. I will half to sort out deliveries for that. The other thing is that now it is settled and Tam is at home I don’t have to deal with his angry outbursts of him going to school.

Only thing to do now is to get into a positive state of mind and act likes its summer holidays with some restrictions. In my mind I am not expecting the schools to be open in a week and then for them not to open until after easter. So this is the summer holidays winter/spring edition. Yes restrictions are present but we can work our way around that.

I think my only worry is getting enough food delivered. I have one delivery booked already for Monday and enough to keep us going other than perishables, which are Tams favourites, mushrooms, berries and bananas. Hmm, will have to cheat on them for now, got some tinned mushrooms and berries.

Entertaining Tam and myself will be easy for now. The only thing I have to make sure is that we mix it up over the next week or so.

Day 1 nearly done. More to follow.

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