A journey through grief with autism.

Alan Greenwell

3-Minute Read


“May you live in interesting times” - A curse (proven not to be a chinese saying)

Well, these are interesting times and not in a good way. The curse is active and visiting us every day and every hour at the moment. Give me the good old days of loads of people on the street and the car parks being full.

I have tried a few times over the last few days to write something. Each time I have either come up blank or it’s been dark. The lockdown has made things more difficult in many ways. It is a struggle to keep the stocks of the right foods for Tam. It feels wrong taking Tam out to pick up food but I have no option. I hate being out with Tam at the moment because he picks up on the strange atmosphere and the strange behaviour.

Last time we went out to the local shop I managed to keep Tam chilled right up to the point I had to ask someone to move. They had stood in the same spot for a full five minutes on their phone texting or something. They were not taking any notice of what was going on around them and should not have been there. I asked him to move and pointed out that he had been standing in the same place for 5 minutes and other people were waiting to come in the store and he just said “I don’t care a toss about other people”, the worst of humanity. I later saw him arguing with the staff after trying to buy loads of Easter eggs. I am disgusted that stores are even stocking Easter eggs. For fuck’s sake the space on the truck could have carried another loaf of bread or something more useful. Easter eggs are not needed right now and anyone who wants to buy easter eggs needs to have a long and serious look at themselves. Waste of money at the best of times, a criminal waste of resources and space right now.

There we go, me getting dark. I have always hated selfish people and this is just proving the point. In the news, we hear about loads of self-centred and selfish people that think the rules are for other people. We hear and see people buying as much as they can just to throw it away a week later when it goes off. Society needs to look at its self in the mirror, it’s not a pretty reflection.

So for a large part of the time, I don’t feel I have much to write about. My time is all about keeping me and Tam safe and happy. Tam being happy is all I need. We are taking each day, following our little schedule and doing what we need to do.

Once we get through this and come out of the other side I will get back to writing more, but for now, it will be sporadic.

Stay safe and stay home

Alan & Tam

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